The Artist in the Ambulance

Because someday I'm going to do an agglomeration of public service announcements:

Today's Topic: When (and when NOT) to call an ambulance.

If you are a young woman with heavy menstrual cramps, and the Ibuprofen your mother just gave you is not working yet, do NOT call the ambulance. Try waiting a half and hour and maybe taking a couple more. You are welcome to call your doctor's office or pharmacist for medication info.

If you find yourself suddenly on the floor, alone, without recollection of the last 5 minutes, please, feel free to call the ambulance. We do not want this to happen again while you are trying to drive.

If your leg started hurting 3 months ago for an unknown reason, and you decide you finally have time to stop in and get it checked out today, you can probably handle walking your ass into the waiting room instead of tying up the ambulance and keeping the EMT's from people who can't breathe.

If you have gotten hung up on a barbed-wire fence after going 100+ miles per hour on an ATV and clotheslined yourself on said fence, and an hour later (after you have finally freed yourself), it feels that your throat is full of fluid, for Christ's sake, CALL the ambulance. Do not have your little neice with a learner's permit drive you.

Thank you, and have a safe day.